today we were fine until we weren’t. now we feel saddened. this trick of the mind... we feel saddened to be right back at what seems to be square one. but,
what was ever truly sad about a new beginning?
it’s funny how we mourn the things that have kept us bound. literally. it’s funny. strange, how twisted our minds can be. it was once the long balloon, being twisted and turned into a familiar shape. a shape that made sense. then one day it’s not a giraffe anymore. it’s not a bunny or a heart. it’s just frustration... twisting and turning until something pops. just been craving release.
it’s that cry we wouldn't let ourselves have because we punish and puncture ourselves. the unassuming masochists won’t let themselves, let. it. out.
it’s that walk we wouldn’t let ourselves take because we just... didn’t have the energy. maybe we didn’t want to see anyone we knew, or anyone we didn’t. the one afraid to inhale any of that air that rushed out of the balloon.
so then, we get back to us.
slowly but surely we get up. the walk we took today was one to the bathroom for tissue, to wipe away the tears from the cry we finally rewarded ourselves with. tough week. tough break. but see, this is progress. this is life. this is breath, taking shape. maybe we’ll make it a mile or two around the lake tomorrow. maybe we’ll see a bird.
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